My Menstrual Cup Experience.
This is the last post of my three-part series talking about menstruation and menstrual cup! In my first post, I talked about the menstruation in general and how the society I'm in views it. The second post talks about how I discovered menstrual cups. And this post talks about my experience using one.
That said, I'm going to describe my experience in detail, which means
I will be talking a lot about menstruation and inserting cups into my
vagina. If you feel uncomfortable reading about that, I say close the tab, but just think about how
ridiculous it is to feel awkward and disgusted by vaginas and
menstruation.
I deal with this literally every month and it is
what I have to do to to get through my period for the rest of my life.
Why do I even have to ask people to try to understand a natural body
process that has been happening since forever.
Okay, I'm done being angry. Here's my experience with menstrual cups.
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I wish I could say that using a menstrual cup is easy, but it is a process that requires practice, patience, determination and maybe a little luck. It sounds dramatic but it was truly, a journey for me. My experience using a menstrual cup wasn't a smooth one. There were months of pain, frustrations and even tears. But despite the pain and struggles, I have no regrets switching from pads to cups.
I really believe switching to menstrual cups is one of the best choices I made in my life, which is why I want to share to everyone about my experience. My aim isn't to convince everyone reading this to change, but letting girls and guys know (so they can tell the women in their lives) that this choice exists. Or if someone find my blog posts just a fun read, that's fine too.
A Painful Beginning
The first menstrual cup I got was the Freedom menstrual cup and I was super eager to test it out.
After I bought that cup, I wanted to believe it was the solution to all my period problems. I thought if this menstrual cup work, I would never have to worry about pads and leaking ever again. Heck, some people on the internet even said using menstrual cups got rid of their cramps.
My period arrived and it was time to test it out. Then, it suddenly hit me.
I've never inserted anything into my vagina before.
I was a pad user my whole life. Never touched a tampon before. And now, I'm inserting a silicone cup right into my lady parts. When my brain registered this thought, I was filled with fear. I expressed my worries to my mom, and even she thought it was a little bit big to stuff it in a vagina.
Well, they say it's easier for women who had given birth or if you've had sex/used sex toys, but if you're like me who had nothing inside my vagina before, oh boy, it doesn't really help. There's no easy way to do it, except to stretch the opening of your vagina.
It hurt a lot. After many unsuccessful attempts, I was in tears sitting on the bathroom floor. It was painful, but I was more frustrated about how everything didn't worked out the way I imagined. I had the thought that using a menstrual cup was going to be the best thing ever, but now I couldn't even get it inside my body.
I couldn't use my cup for the first cycle. I couldn't use it again for the second cycle, because it still hurt. And I think I finally managed to insert the cup correctly during the third cycle. I was relieved, but it was too early to celebrate. I didn't know if it would work.
Unfortunately, a menstrual cup doesn't guarantee it won't leak. There are many factors such as the size of the cup and the height of your cervix that could affect the effectiveness of a menstrual cup. In my case, my first cup could hold some blood, but it will still leak. I think my low cervix and tilted cervix had something to do with it.
Since my cup isn't 100% effective for me, I would still use pads as a safety net. But even using a leaky cup meant I didn't have to use as much pads as when I didn't have a cup. I was already saving both money and the environment by using a cup that wasn't suitable for me. I considered this a small victory.
Despite it not working 100% of the time, I continued using that cup for at more than a year. Some days it would work, other times it wouldn't.
The Switch
After using my Freedom cup for about a year, I started to get a bit dissatisfied that my cup wasn't working. I saw posts about how people have the perfect fit on their first cup and even a colleague of mine used her cup just fine! I was asking myself, why isn't this working for me?
I was aware that my cervix was titled, but I never really measured the height of my cervix. So this time, I measured and used a very handy chart to find the best possible cup for my body. And this was how I stumbled upon the Merula Menstrual Cup which is shorter and wider than the average cup. It fit my low cervix height and held more volume too.
Although this cup seemed to be a better fit, I was very afraid that I would make the mistake of buying the wrong cup again. Unlike the Freedom cup, I could only get the Merula cup online from a store from Singapore. That means if it doesn't work for me, it's going to be costly mistake. A $57.40 SGD mistake.
But I thought, screw it! If the cup still leaks, at least now I have a cute, orange cup in my collection. So I ordered and patiently waited for it to arrive. And thank the flying spaghetti lord, because it arrived to my doorstep without a hitch.
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| I love the packaging so much lmao. |
Although I have been using a menstrual cup for more than a year, transitioning to my new cup wasn't as smooth as expected. My new Merula cup had a different shape—it was shorter and wider than the average cup shape, and it recommended a different folding technique that I was using.
It took a lot of experimenting and tries, but I eventually I got it. And it was like a miracle happened. It never leaked.
I was beyond ecstatic because I thought it would never happen to me, but it did! And it was at this moment that I thought that all my struggles and frustrations are worth it, for it if wasn't for them I wouldn't find this cup that fits me.
My Verdict
It works. And as a menstrual cup user that experienced both failure and success, I still think switching to a cup is worth considering because it saves money in the long run and saves the environment. It's light, and it means I don't have to bring a bunch of plastic bags along with me wherever I go.
I do have to mention that I'm still not totally pad-free. I still use pads, but I use the reusable ones. You know, the ones made with cotton. So I'm not buying more plastic, but I'm using these pads as a safety nets in case a leak does occur.
As I'm typing this, I have never spent a single cent on plastic pads for more than a year.
HOWEVER, I totally understand using a menstrual cup isn't a decision you can easily make. It's a big change for most people, and it is a scary thought to insert a cup into your vagina. Even I, a person that didn't doubt the benefits of a menstrual cup, took a long time to switch to using a cup.
A con of the menstrual cup is the extremely steep learning curve. It isn't easy as wearing period panties or just inserting a tampon, as it requires practice and a bit of technique. It is also bigger than a tampon so it can cause pain for people that has no experience inserting anything into their vagina.
Besides the difficulty of using a menstrual cup properly, I understand that not everyone is comfortable of the idea of putting things into their lady parts. Even my mom who was by my side the whole journey said she would never use a menstrual cup. So if that's you, that's okay too.
But if you ever thought about switching to cups, here's my advice: Do your research, ask questions (to me or the internet) and measure your cervix height because cups aren't one-size-fits-all. Most importantly, go at your own pace. Not everyone can turn into a menstrual cup user overnight, because it's just not that easy.
Questions I Received
During the early stages of my research and after I switched to using cups, I talked to some friends and my mom about it. All of them were either grossed out by the idea of sticking a cup into a vagina, or terrified. Some of them believed it meant my virginity will be taken away by a silicone cup.
But I think the disgusted reactions greatly reduced after a few years. These days, people are more curious about it.
There's a lot of misconceptions and questions when it comes to female sexual health in general, but I'll list MY answers to some of the questions people in my life had asked me when I discussed menstrual cups with them.
1. Inserting a menstrual cup into your vagina? Isn't that gross?
Menstruation is always gross because you're literally bleeding out blood out of your vagina every month. Nothing about it is elegant and pretty, but it is a part of being a woman. Using a cup is just another method of dealing with the blood.I must admit, since menstrual cups don't absorb the blood like pads or tampons, you do really get to see how much you bleed. So if you're already disgusted by blood when you're using pads, you'll probably won't be okay to see period blood in its true form when you're using a cup.
Also the belief that you bleed only two to three tablespoons during a cycle is false in my case, it's way more than that.
2. Won't your vagina get loose after inserting a cup there every month?
I literally don't give a shit if the world considers my virginity is taken by a silicone cup. Here I am, doing my best to save the environment and all you care is the tightness of my vagina. If my future partner gets upset over some cup in my vagina, I say, go fuck yourself man.I have seen people on the internet questioning if using a menstrual cup will take away their virginity, asking things like if it will break the hymen. But that's not how everything works.
There's a misunderstood belief that a hymen is like a barrier that can only be broken when you have penetrative sexual activity, but the reality is your hymen wears down over time. Other activities such as horseback riding and dancing can wear down your hymen too. (Hi, I was a Ballet dancer for more than a decade)
The status of your hymen has nothing to do with your virginity, and using a menstrual cup has nothing to do with my virginity. Also, there's nothing sexual about inserting a menstrual cup into a vagina.
3. Does that mean you don't have to use pads anymore?
Yes, if you manage to find a cup that fits you perfectly.
Before I switched to my second cup, I thought a leak-free period was impossible. But getting a cup that fits to your body worked for me and I rarely stain my panties now. I do use reusable cotton pads, so yeah, I use pads, just not the store-bought plastic ones. I never have to buy pads again.
4. How do you clean your menstrual cup?
First, you have to remove the cup from your body. You can do this while sitting on the toilet bowl, standing (although I don't do this), or squatting, which is the easiest. To clean the cup, the best scenario is when you have a sink near you so can just reach over and wash it with the tap.
Of course, there isn't always a sink near the toilet bowl, especially when you're outside. In Malaysia, most toilets have a handheld bidet sprayer, which is both a curse and a blessing. But in this case, I consider it partly a blessing as I can wash my cup with the sprayer.
There was one time though where I underestimated the pressure of the sprayer and created a geyser with my cup and there was blood and water everywhere. I have never revealed this incident until today in this post, you're welcome.
However, I understand cleaning a cup can be difficult in countries or places where a bidet spray is not readily available. But I have heard of people from the internet bringing a cup of water into the toilet stall to wash their cup.
5. Is it possible to have a menstrual cup stuck in you?
Yes, but I don't think it's an unsolvable situation. Personally, I never experienced dealing with a stuck cup, but I have heard of people struggling to get theirs out for an hour. Some people even had their partners help to get the cup free.
Firstly, it all boils down to the position of your cup in your vagina. If you inserted and positioned your cup correctly, it should be fine. Secondly, the way you extract our cup also matters.
All cups require you to pinch at their base to break the seal and release the suction. Then, you pull it out by the stem or handle. While pulling it out, it helps to use your pelvic floor muscles to push it out. If you're unsure what muscle I'm talking about, it's the muscle you use when you're trying to hold in your pee.
What if your cup did a 180 somersault in your vagina? It happened to me once (I don't know how either) and I used my finger to locate the rim of the cup and rotate it back to the normal position. Then, I extracted it as usual.
For first-time users, it's normal to start panicking when you can't get your cup out. If it really happens, just remember to stay calm, get in the shower, try different positions and try again. Also, take breaks if you need to.
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And that is all I have to share about menstrual cups.
I can't believe it took me close to three years to finally write this all down.. BUT I DID IT. I hope anyone reading this will find this useful or at least entertaining. Again, I'm not trying to convince people to switch, I just want to let everyone know that you have this choice.
Menstruation is still a rather sensitive issue to talk, but I think it's time we move on from it being a taboo topic to becoming an everyday topic. It doesn't matter if you're a guy, a girl or an alien, talking about menstruation, sex or anything in that field shouldn't be as awkward as it is.
I'm not an expert in menstrual cups, but I'm happy to answer the best I can if you have any questions. Please feel free to leave a comment anywhere or message me privately.
If you want to learn more about menstrual cup, everything is pretty much available by Googling. There are also plenty of forums online and YouTube channels that talk about menstrual cups. A channel that I highly recommend is Put a Cup In It, because they cover pretty much everything about cups.
I know I've been talking about menstrual cups a lot but I just wanted to say there are menstrual discs too! There's a lot of options, ladies!
If you've read this far, I thank you so much!
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