Dreams.

I remember I had wrote another post about dreams too but it was three years ago. I went back to check what I wrote and realized that .. I'm really childish, I guess. A dream about T.O.P. Hmm, I don't get such nice dreams lately.

Here have a T.O.P.

If I get a boyfriend like him, I'll nosebleed myself to death everyday. 

I find myself having not so pleasant dreams to no dreams lately. Actually, I don't remember having a lot of good dreams. Some were plain weird and there was once I woke up with tears in my eyes. Dreams are not real yet they can haunt you and affect you a while, no?

My mom have quite a lot of weird dreams and it's amusing to hear what she has to say. Mean while my brother's dream are mostly absolutely illogical and frequent that most of the time I don't give a damn to what he has to say anymore. My father never dreams.

Yeah, I had nightmares lately. One of the dreams I had just a few days ago was a sudden appearance of a ghost child or something. Her head suddenly turned and was facing me with her face bloodied and stuff like that. I was scared but I didn't wake up immediately.

And I had another bloody, weird dream. It was a long time ago but I still remember it clearly. It creeped me out so much I woke up, gasping. Brrr, it was scary.

Today I had another dream again and it left me thinking, even while driving (not a good idea). The problem with dreams is that you can't remember it entirely as you forget some little parts here and there. So I was thinking a lot, trying to fit in the puzzle of my dream.

I was riding a roller coaster. And I remember in front of me was a friend and her mother. I'm not sure her mother is that daring in real life too. I love roller coasters. I think I heard my friend talking to her mom while on the ride, but I don't think anyone is able to do that. I don't know.

It was at outdoors and we going quite high up. Down below us was only water. I think the place was similar to Genting Highlands. Well, it was a dream so of course things won't go well.

I saw the tracks in front of me bend into a sharp angle, and the roller coaster was supposed to turn as well. But instead our roller coaster flew off the track. We flew quite high up and we were turning in the air. Everything was in slow motion.

I didn't scream, nor did I heard anyone scream. We were just turning slowly in the air. I wasn't even feeling afraid as gravity pulled us closer to the water. I just thought, 'Oh, I'm going to die.' I thought of my mom, saying to myself that I love her. Then, thoughts like 'I'm going to die' kept repeating in my mind.

We did a final turn before the roller coaster will finally hit the waters. Let me remind you, it's a weird dream so of course things won't just end like that. We were only just a few feet before we land and suddenly the roller coaster just landed on the water softly. It was just like an aircraft guided by an expert pilot landing perfectly on the runway.

And we didn't even sink, we floated.

I immediately felt relieved. It was weird so I guess everyone was just as shocked as me. I don't know if we were saved or how we got off from the roller coaster. Of course weird things won't just end here, so I've lost my left thumb after the ride.

I have no idea how my thumb disappeared. No one chopped it off or did I got injured during the fall of the roller coaster. It didn't hurt and it looked like it was already halfway healing. But there was no bandage or anything, so the area where my thumb is supposed to be looked like the end of a sausage.

I wasn't the only one. People were missing their fingers too. Some were missing more than one finger and just like me, they didn't feel pain at all. Just imagine one of your fingers is gone, like how you crop a finger out of your hand in a photo.

Somehow everyone gathered, even people who still have all their fingers. And I don't know how but we found out that someone or something is removing our fingers based on something that we did. I don't remember what is it but I guess I'm lucky to have only one left thumb removed. Hey, I still can write.

I even thought I still can play Beat Up and Guitar! Ohh, I played too much Audition.

The place we gathered wasn't a theme park. There was two buildings and it reminded me of my primary school. I remembered I kept staring at my hand. I was on the second floor of the building where everyone was talking about missing fingers. Then, I went downstairs to walk at a field nearby, I don't know why.

Of course, it was a dream so, suddenly the two buildings caught on fire and I was saved from being burned alive. I remember running on the field, horrified. And then the dream ended there. I woke up and was so glad my thumb was still there.

I think dreams are related to things you experienced or things that you thought a lot. Like how we have our fingers removed after a roller coaster ride is similar to how people die in Final Destination. The places in my dream are similar places I been to before. And my missing thumb and the fire was probably related to me scalding my left thumb during work.

Really, how messed up dreams can be.

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My heart was breaking and my eyes couldn't stop crying when I watched One Litre of Tears. What would you do if your body loses its function slowly? First you lost your ability to run, then walk, then sit, then speech, then you're just waiting for death to arrive.

I don't think I can be as strong as Aya.

I love it when Remioromen sings the chorus like KONAAAAAAAAAA YUKIIIII NEE. Owhmaigawd, the theme songs in the drama fits so well. Every time when 3 Gatsu 9 Ka, Konayuki or Only Human is played during the drama, I would just cryyyyy.